Raymond Robert James
Born September 15, 2016 11:19 pm via cesarean
21 inches, 8 lbs 10 oz
Big sister is madlyin love!
I don’t know how you ladies with kid blog! I’m so forgetful. I constantly think, oh I should blog about that. Then Amy throws a toy across the room, hugs me, or play growls at me. Just that quick, the thought is gone.
For those of you who do not know, Hubby and I took Amy to Hawaii for Christmas. And well, it seems we left with a stowaway!
Baby #2 is on his/her way. This one was conceived with no drugs and no doctors. Truly a miracle, part of God’s plan. I’m unbelievably shocked and elated.
It’s still quite early so anything can happen. My midwives suggested doing the progesterone suppositories again to help prevent miscarriage.
EDD is September 21…a fall baby!
It’s CD3 of our first cycle TTC. I’m definitely in a better head space than I was a month ago. My little sister is pregnant again and so is Bestie. I really want to get pregnant again so I can doit with them but at the same time, I like the idea of being able to support them. I’ve decided that we’ll try naturally (with the assistance of OPKs) until the end of the year. If I don’t conceive then, I’ll make an appointment to get some metformin. We’ve also decided that we probably won’t do much more than metformin to try to get pregnant this time. We have already been given a gorgeous (albeit precocious) blessing. We don’t want to go as nutso as we did last time.
Obviously we’re back on the eating well and exercising regularly. I have been really bad about that and weigh around 218. That’s disgusting to me but I earned each of those pounds by not working out and eating crap. I will need to earn shedding them with hard work.
I feel really mentally and emotionally healthy going into this. It feels good. Obviously in a year or so I may not feel the same if we haven’t conceived but we’ll cross that bridge when and if we get there.
Until next time, I wish peace and love for each of you. Be well friends!
A pictorial of her birthday. I made all of the decorations. My sister made her dress. Amy had a blast!
I’ve been working on a post about Amy’s birthday party but I need to share this first. She’s decided she’s done nursing! I’m a wreck!
I know it’s irrational but I feel rejected. (Really dumb because she wants to cuddle with me all the time.) We worked so hard to get the hang of nursing and now she’s giving it up. I knew it was coming…She’d been only nursing at night. I’m not ready for this bond to be over!
I wanted to EBF for 6 months (we did). I wanted to nurse her for at least a year (I did). After that, I wanted her to decide when to wean (she did). I met all of my BF goals. Why am I so broken-hearted?
I seriously have been crying all night since I put her down and she refused the breast for the 4th night in a row.
Hubby is trying to be supportive but doesn’t get it. He keeps telling me how proud I should be of what we accomplished. I am, but that doesn’t make this any easier. I’m beside myself with grief over the end of our BF journey. I don’t know what to do!
I have some really great news that I wanted to share with all of you. Since Amelia has been born, it’s become very clear to me that I need to reinvest in my businesses so I can leave my day job. I’ve started working from home full-time so I can see her more often but it’s still not enough. I miss that little girl between every break. I need to be able to spend more time with her.
I’ve decided to change organizations and am currently getting certified with ProDoula for both labor and postpartum support. In the process of doing that, Baby G’s mom (K) said she’d love to become a doula as well. We discussed it and she’s become an independent contractor for me. We talked and one thing led to another, and before I knew it, I’m owning a doula agency. Today I took on another doula. My little agency is growing. I’m so proud. I’m getting a logo created and my website should be live by the end of the month. I’m so happy.
In other news, we’ll be trying for baby #2 by the end of summer. I’m really ready to be pregnant again and to have another blessing join our family. Full disclosure? I’m also petrified! I’m so scared that it won’t happen again. I don’t know that I can go another 8 years TTC.
Obviously this time around will be a little less desperate as we’ve already been given a gorgeous little girl (who is currently laying on daddy’s chest giving him kisses). Hubby is so excited for us to get pregnant again. I don’t want to let him down. I have a pack and a half of birth control left. Then it’s TTC again.
I’m trying not to pysch myself out before we even start trying but I’m failing. It’s getting better. I started arguments with Hubby a few times to avoid baby dancing. He caught on and asked me what was wrong. I made up some stupid lie. He asked if we were going to start TTC on Amy’s birthday like was always the plan. I fibbed and said I wanted to finish the last few packs because I think it’ll help to keep my hormones balanced. I wanted to buy more time before the crushing defeat of my first BFN.
I talked to K about how I was feeling. She helped me to find the words so I could have a heart to heart with Hubby. He helped me to feel better. It feels great to know that he’s as invested in this as I am. He’s scared too but wants to help me with whatever I need. I love this man!
We’ll get through this together. We’ve started to do yoga at night again. Amy tries to crawl up our legs in downward dog. Then she’s tries to emulate us in corpse pose and happy baby. Regardless of how this pans out, we are fully aware of how lucky we are to have this beautiful, smart, incredibly strong baby girl who loves to laugh and cuddle.
Posted in Doula, family, health, marriage, motherhood, PCOS, Positive Outlook, pregnancy, Small Business
Tagged Amelia, blessed, doula, PCOS, TTC
I didn’t realize how far behind I’d fallen on blogging until I posted a photo of Amelia on my Instagram. One of my favorite blogging Cysters commented on it. (Thanks Satoya!)
Guys, seriously! Amy is walking. She has 7 teeth. And I’m planning her 1st birthday party. Where did this year go?
I miss you all. I’m coming back I promise. Here’s my baby girl to tide you over.
I can’t believe it’s been so long since I posted. I’m working on a post about traditions. Here’s some new Amelia photos to tide you over!
She’s such a ham!